A birthday baby for us?

Today is day 1 of our official transfer month. This will be our first official attempt with our donated embryos. I started the estrace today 3x per day from now on. Let's hope my lining grows better this way with the vaginal method. My first lining check will be April 12. Our projected transfer date is April 28. So 26 little days!

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So... Adoption?

I've spent the past few days researching adoption. I've been engulfed in listening to podcasts from Adoption Now and I met with a woman from my Houston IVF support group. She adopted within 2 months from Adoption Alliance and has a 16 month old son. She broke down a lot of the barriers I thought were on our way: 1. She is loving here on visas and doesn't have her green card 2. They agency was not adamant about her being done with her Ivf journey 3. It only took her 2 months to get chosen by her birth mom. Yesterday after listening to some very heartbreaking stories I was really not sure I could go through with the whole process. All of the people on the podcast said it is not for the faint of heart, it's the toughest thing you'll ever go through, it is a war and a battle like no other. Frankly I'm not sure my heart can take more heartache. But after telling Mike about this fears he is still very much on this adoption train. He just wants to be a dad alrea...

National Fertility Awareness Week

Here's the FB post I wrote today. It is National Fertility Awareness Week so I am writing this to encourage those struggling with infertility not to continue hiding in the shadows and to consider unburdening yourself with the weight that you carry. It is not about telling your story to gain pity. It is about giving yourself the permission to shine a light on a dark and very difficult path you are on. Opening up to my fertility struggles publicly at this time last year gave me freedom from a self-inflicted cag e. No longer was I trying to keep my emotions hidden from those who could be my biggest support network. I learned how brave I really was, to be vulnerable with something that was so deeply painful, and to not be afraid to let others see that pain. It gave me the permission to gracefully say no to baby showers or birthday parties, and left those hosting with understanding and compassion. It gave me the release of carrying the secret like a hippopotamus on my back. I...

Reconnecting with Spirit and Faith

Well... it was Mother's Day yesterday. I knew it was going to be a tough day. So for the whole week I started preparing by tapping into my tools. Mainly Gabrielle Bernstein . She is my go to spirit guide whenever I fall from my spiritual path. With everything that has gone on the past few weeks, I really felt like my faith and understanding of the universe was being challenged. I came across this talk she did about her struggle with infertility - in divine timing! In it she reminds me of the following: - that the Universe has a divine plan that is right for us and we just need to let it happen - "those who are certain about the outcome can afford to wait and to wait without anxiety" - a course in miracles - the more I try to control the situation, the further I am pushing my desires away and not working with the Universe but against it But here is my struggle... is taking my uterine tea trying to control the situation? Is doing fertility yoga and womb massage try...

The Motherhood Milestone

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